Even as the downturn of our economy has made a noticeable impact on some meeting hospitality venues, others are well-positioned and enjoying level, and even increased business activity compared to recent years!

What are the factors that can make the difference??

Here is what we hear from our members:

Facilities, Amenities and Geography

1. Camp-style retreat and conference centers (50 to 1000 guests, at least two seasons a year) are seeing an increase in business in the Eastern US and the Western and Southwestern states, level in the Southeast and Mid-West where church group business is high. Attributes: Relative low cost versus other choices for large groups; expansive natural setting and a wide array of facilities.

2. Small venues (from 8 to 20 guests) are generally healthy across the US (except Hawaii) IF their marketing is diversified among portals and directories that include:

• Vacation Home Rentals
• Weddings and Family Gatherings
• Retreats
• Directories and influence that draw Corporate Meetings

Attributes: 8 to 12 guests lodge in private room with bath; facilities include a dedicated meeting space AND a private chef provides excellent cuisine; diverse revenue sources; customer that expects to pay more AND gets what they pay for; corporate groups who are willing to pay for privacy, service, service and service.

3. Mid size venues (30 to 60 guests) are turning in mixed reviews across the US

AAR members whose websites were developed by our parent company, Feather River Productions, LLC recently asked us to explain website traffic stats which show All About Retreats as a referring domain. ALL AAR members will find at least some traffic under referring domains that is credited to All About Retreats … but the info does not give a complete picture!

Our Webmaster, James Foreman, reviewed FRP client stats as well as AAR’s stats. Here is what he discovered, which may shed light on all of our Members’ web stat interpretations:

1. Keeping in mind that the website visitors coming from AAR to each Member’s site normally only see your listing page ( i.e. http://allaboutretreats.com/centers/massachusetts.html), then visit the AAR home page. This is because when there is a search on Google, we have indexed for local natural search keywords. Unless they are web savvy or know the crumb trail they followed, visitors do not know that they came to your site through All About Retreats
2. Our company name is not in the title of the state or region page, which is the title that a person reads when they view our link on Google, Yahoo etc. When people complete your contact form they may not know which site they found you on, especially in relation to All About Retreats. We will be changing this soon (see below).
3. In looking at our client stats and AAR’s stats (Google Analytics), AAR consistently sends visitors to ALL member websites. We suggest that you look at your Google stats on a regular basis and view the referring domains aspect of your stats to see how many clicks you have been getting over a period of a year or so. In 2008, AAR is among the 5 highest referrers from a website that is not a search engine for many AAR Members and our website clients.
4. Further, you will see in your stats that on average people who come to your site from AAR, stay on your webiste, viewing 3 to 5 pages, which is a healthy indicator of interest in your site, your center and what you have to offer.
5. In addition, this time of year is the slowest time for booking retreats across the board. This changes considerably after the new year begins. We hear about conversion slow downs every year at this time, and are working to increase our exposure to areas beyond retreats so that this is alleviated through diversification and an advanced search market strategy.
6. Conclusion: Though we have branded All About Retreats, we focus more energy on branding our advertising Members, not reminding web surfers what site they’re on. This appears to be a negative if a company relies on hearing about referrals from those emailing or calling you rather than reading and knowing how ti interpret your own web statistics.
7. Finally, notice how many times people DO NOT answer your contact form question about where they heard about you. Is your office staff inquiring about referral source? Are you?

GOOD NEWS FOR AAR MEMBERS:

Within the month of November, All About Retreats will launch it’s 9th iteration with some powerful new features and benefits to our Members. AAR will leave similar directory websites in the dust with our new services, and give more control to our listing Members in viewing their clicks, content and all else.

So, if you’re thinking about joining the AAR community … stop thinking and just do it! About 80% of our Members are are long-term loyal customers to whom we are grateful for continuing confidence and support! Get your sustainable business infrastructure in place and get ready for 2009!

Business owners are undoubtedly feeling the effects of “the way we do things around here” for good or for better. There is always untapped potential when we evaluate and indeed question our habits - a change of mind, a shift in perception can almost instantly improve the bottom line! Here’s how …

The economic shift is but a clue that complacency of abundance and lifestyle is our greatest challenge. Change and acceptance that things just aren’t working provide the opportunity. Say what you want to about the idea of “going green”, which SOUNDS proactive and positive … there are simple actions you can take RIGHT NOW, most of which will cost you not one dime and in fact may give you a larger INTENTIONALLY DIRECTED spendable, at home and in your company.

1. Avoid Fast (and prepared) Food - it is way over-packaged and most fast-food companies are responsible for producing mountains of trash. By avoiding fast food whenever possible, you’ll help reduce this needless wast
2. Create A Compost Pile: It’s easy to do. Find a corner of the yard that’s out of the way. Carefully throw food wastes (leftovers, eggshells, coffee grounds, spoiled vegetables, etc.) into a pile and mix with dirt. Every week or so, turn the pile over with a shovel to give it more air. In a few weeks, it will turn into a rich, nutrition soil that will help plants grow. Just think: What used to be “garbage” is now a valuable substance!
3. Grown your own - veggies and herbs OR
4. Participate in a community garden AND Buy Local - the happy long term by-product of the “Loca-Vore’ movement is more self-sufficiency in your locale
5. Learn to cook delicious, nutrient dense meals that will satisfy you completely, boost your immune system and potentially reduce your need for medical interventions (READ: insurance and basic doctor visits) - talk with a Vital Health Educator and Nutrition Coach for guidance!
6. Eschew Junk purchases - the number one way in which individuals harm the environment is by CONSUMPTION, so stop buying so much crap!!

There is a cost and ripple effect to everything in life– every action we take and every dollar we spend. Do what you can do and get back to the basics, the rest will take care of itself. The very act of marrying new behaviors and endeavors with green leads to overall cost savings - money and environmental. Not to mention the added benefits of less overwhelm and more intentional living!

Editor Speak: I recently discovered this technique through a fortunate stroke of serendipity. Without the resistance of my ‘jaundiced eye’ skepticism sprinkled lavishly with cynical reservation, I began reading about EFT and playing with the technique on low level anxiety and minor physical disturbances, such as a headache. I achieved immediate relief and no recurrence.

The essence behind EFT is in this Discovery Statement:

“The cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body’s energy system.”

… it highlights the awesome story of discovery in 1980 by a psychotherapist, who was one in a long line of therapists who worked with a woman to clear her intense water phobia. After 18 months of conventional psychotherapy, she’d made no progress. She suffered from frequent headaches, nightmares and one day, she complained of stomach discomfort. As a student of the body’s energy system, the therapist decided to step outside the box and tap with his fingers under her eyes (an end point of the stomach meridian). She immediately announced that her disturbing thoughts about water were gone!. The story goes that she raced to a nearby swimming pool and began to throw water on her face! No fear, no headaches or stomach ache and the phobia never returned.

How it works

When the woman was experiencing her fear … thinking about water … the energy flowing to her stomach was disrupted and the energy imbalance caused her emotional intensity. Tapping under her eyes sent pulses through the stomach meridian and balanced the emotional intensity and the fear dissolved. SO, now you have learned something about your negative emotions: They are caused by energy disruptions.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is “an emotional, needle free version of acupuncture that is based on new discoveries regarding the connection between your body’s subtle energies, your emotions, and your health. EFT has been reported successful in thousands of cases covering a huge range of emotional, health and performance issues. It often works where nothing else will.”

Learn the Basics for FREE Online

You can download a manual of the basic technique (disclaimer: Nothing contained herein should be considered a medical claim or medical advice) on the EmoFreedom website , where you will also find video shorts of EFT in action. You can also subscribe to a weekly eNews EFT Insights, which is packed with useful information, links to short videos and articles posted by EFT practitioners around the world.

INVITING NEW POSSIBILITIES … So, as the days grow longer and you can make time to invite new possibilities into your life, take a venture into EFT and discover it’s effectiveness for yourself. The EFT website gives access to practitioners … many do tele-sessions. My experiences with EFT, both on my own and with a practitioner, have been astounding and in a future article, I will share about it. Meanwhile, if you are interested, send me an email and I’ll be happy to speak from my personal experiences or provide a reference to my very skillful and wise practitioner.

EFT is a highly regarded healing tool now used in combination with other conventional and alternative modalities. It gives you a skill to tap away negative emotions, resolve mild and severe physical symptoms and realize the freedom that each of us is born with and intended to share through our unique gifts in this lifetime!

LAST WORD: Please note that “Try it on everything” does not include inexperienced people applying EFT on psychotic patients or otherwise “going where you don’t belong.” Although the EFT Basic Recipe is effective, complex healing issues require guidance by a practitioner with a higher level of understanding and sensitive, professional skill.

A Little History

Back in 1998 when All About Retreats was born, there was no practical and reliable information about retreat facilities in northern California. The Retreat Centers section of Common Ground was full of ads that told only about “a magical mountaintop” and “sacred, ancient healing ground”. But if a  meeting planner wanted to know whether a meeting space could accommodate their yoga group of 30,  she had to make a slew of phone calls … websites and email were still really NEW back then!

James and I knew first hand about retreat center facilities … remember, our first business was catering to retreat and workshop groups! We took note of lodging, meeting facilities and guest amenities wherever we cooked … Did you know that AAR began by matching groups with retreat facilities? Within the first 6 months of our ad campaign in Common Ground and other Bay Area alternative tabs, we got almost 500 telephone calls from meeting planners and facilitators, because we had the info they wanted! Bingo!

Today, nearly every retreat and conference center has a website

…that shows photos of meeting rooms, if not a comprehensive list of meeting spaces, their dimensions, and square footage. An improvement, but, as more facilitators and teachers employ electronic media to deliver lectures and presentations, meeting planners require more detail about facilities. How easy is it for them to find that info on your website? How familiar is your staff with your facilities?

It ain’t the size, it’s what you do with it!

Now, don’t get all excited, but here is a tool that can help: I discovered a well-done presentation written for  the sales staff and meeting support people at a 500 person capacity conference center. It’s called The Room Capabilities and Equipment Book. Following the nuts and bolts of a system that is practical and economical to put in place. You can bet that your center’s sales will rise and your staff will thank you for making the task of courting meeting planners more efficient. If your sales folks work on ‘commish’ … this reference booklet will help them make more sales!

Details in this model include all the vitals per meeting room:

• max capacity and a display of all possible seating arrangements
• complete conference center inventory:
• tables and chairs
• staging
• audio-visual/IT equipment and A/V supply

There is also an ideal set-up section detailing rooms in their most popular layouts, which is handy to show prospective customers who come for a site visit and/or you can use it to plan meetings. The Room Capabilities and Equipment Book is a really slick tool for reservationists, sales, event planning, and operations staff, as well as food and beverage coordination and set-up. You can create a few pages or an entire notebook, depending on your facilities.

Satisfaction Guaranteed: it will save time, support your staff and probably make you money, too!

In your profession or business, you are a leader. The very nature of what you do commits you to ensure the comfort and safety of the people who will attend a meeting, retreat, program or workshop, especially if it is residential or off-site. If you are a meeting planner, you will likely attend this event and manage it.

If you are a facilitator, you will not only attend, you will teach and/or lead. You carry a double edged sword, because you select or approve the choice of venue for your program; you are also presenting the content and will be in the limelight start to finish. More for you later …

Meeting planners: Have you ever been in a group hospitality setting where one or a few ’special needs children’, become the most negatively vocal person(s) in the group? You know how fast bad news travels … Here is a true (war) story:

James and I, first known as Feather River Culinary Artists, cooked for a group who met four times in a year at a Napa Valley spa retreat. The right-hand gal to the facilitator, a well-known author and teacher, selected the food service and menus on behalf of her. We were really new in our business at the time, so we didn’t challenge the request for gourmet vegetarian fare, with no nightshade vegetables (potatoes, peppers, eggplant, tomatoes) and NO SNACKS - No caffeinated coffee, few desserts, no chocolate.

There were about 50 people in the group and the first week-long retreat went pretty well. The second one got off to a rocky start. For some reason, the facilitator was in a bad mood, which she assuaged by secretly eating chocolate and drinking shots of espresso. Only one group member knew about it, because she was a sent to the kitchen to special order it. At some point, Go-for Girl got the blues and started complaining to others in the group. Before we knew what happened, people were disgruntled with the food, claiming hunger, and the NO SNACKS policy caused a veritable rebellion! One afternoon, a guy, dressed only in a sarong, barged into the kitchen demanding a snack. When I held to our service contract and told him NO, he tore through the kitchen, finding a box of apples, grabbed one and issued a famous salute as he raced away in triumph! (INsight: The participants were doing very heavy duty inner work about their sexuality and each of the four sessions was ever more demanding … the pleasure part must have come later, pardon the pun!

“This kind of thing could never happen to me … not on my watch,” you say. Is that so?

Two words: Consent and consistency.

Consent: not all of the group participants were vegetarian. Seven days is a long stretch sans animal protein for a carnivore. Plus, the absence of potatoes, a comfort food, and the other nightshades, limited our menu options. Turns out it was madame facilitator who wanted vegetarian cuisine without nightshades and everyone was a hostage to that decision. One strike.

The deprivation of familiar fare and forms of comforting sweetness, the latter covertly consumed by the facilitator, ignited a fire of discontent and mistrust. Group dynamics being what they are, it came to roost on the food and we became a scapegoat. Our inexperience in business was exposed, though we were almost flawless in preparing and serving meals on time. Fortunately, the right-hand woman was adept at handling madame facilitator’s mood swings and temper tantrums. She was so good at it, that some years later we saw her and she told us she had finally collapsed and taken a long sabbatical.

Lesson learned: Explore, ask important questions. Investigate and challenge. Thus we found a common sense approach to the practical in our business. The solution to the debacle: re-negotiate the contract and find the middle way with the food and service.

Unilateral decisions and Covert operations don’t work. Therein lies the kernel I offer you. When the shit hits the fan, YOU are the one responsible for insanity you never expected to see on your shift… and you must quickly step outside the box known as your job description, and start dancin’, your people skills and diplomacy notwithstanding.

Hello group facilitators … if you haven’t left the room yet! You are wise and fluid with the responsibility you accepted when you decided to teach in a residential group setting. In our experience, some of you are just darn masterful, teaching in a grounded way that works for all! If you are new or not really sure that you have mastered leading the way to sanity…here’s a reliable barometer for you:

…watch your students as they come to the buffet table. How do they relate to the food? Do they eat what they take? Are you brave enough to ask them about their experience with the food? Have you ever talked to the chef and inquired whether your people are behaving themselves in the dining room?

The answers will inform you and give clues you can use to masterfully craft a sane retreat experience. If you foster completion in the retreat or workshop sessions, the food thing is no thing. On the other hand, when folks feel ungrounded in deep process, or tension is unresolved within the group when it’s time to take a meal, what you observe in the dining room will be an eye opener.

Food is the last bastion of familiar comfort and well-being when all else is threatened, disrupted, confronted or otherwise unsettled AND folks are away from their habitat. You must trust me on this matter … Any questions?

Class dismissed!

James and I have registered for one of their programs in October. Believe it or not, we have not attended a group retreat in the past few years! Not for lack of interest, but time and money have been directed into other things …. and I admit as the economy gets softer, that often means basics only!

Peace Village offers programs to the public on a donation basis, or pay what you can afford … Our transportation will be by car, about 3 hours from where we live in Vermont. For those who live in the New York metro area, you can take a bus or a train and arrange local transport to the retreat. If you’re reading this and are in Vermont or upstate NY near the NY thruway (I-84) and want to ride with us, give us a call (802 793 3632)!

I expect that we’ll be housed in gender separated quarters, as spiritual communities often do, and that our lodging will be basic, shared with people we’ve never met. What is more important is the quality of experience. Peace Village is owned and operated by the highly regarded Brahma Kumaris World Spiritual Organization, so it meets the acid test that I encourage: to give due diligence when choosing a teacher or retreat.

So why retreat now? James and I have been married for almost 12 years and are business partners. Stepping out among friends and our community is imperative! We have the time to get away for a weekend … and feel a longing for new learning and a spiritual infusion and in the company of strangers, some of whom will become new friends! It will be a refreshing adventure! More pointedly, we have been interested in the applied principles of Raja Yoga, so-called because it is primarily concerned with the mind, and that is the core teaching at Peace Village. Mind is fascinating study and wisdom grows with exploration.

As the season ripens, morphing into the next once again, where are you and where is your mind? If you are free the weekend of October 10th through 13th and the Peace Village weekend retreat Inner Peace - Inner Power Raja Yoga Meditation appeals to you, join us! If not, take a look at several of our Retreat Programs. Right now - your life may be providing you with a call to take a breather and allowing your heart to open, easing the way to make light work of living- nourishment for your soul! Discover something NEW as Autumn arrives!

Namaste! May peace be with you!

One of my ‘know thyself’ pursuits in the 90’s, took me to the edge in a series of workshops led by Robert Fritz (The Path of Least Resistance), who had a ball with the Life Purpose conundrum. He called it the “Purpose and Existence Structure”: a person who lives seeking to justify their existence by looking for their purpose for being. My own driving structure is about “Freedom and Control” but I withdrew, unready to “see my structure in action”… because I immediately judged it, made it wrong and skulked into the Desert of Ignorance, no longer blissful, however…

Is life purpose the same as “life work” or entering into a heartfelt profession that is driven by deeper values? Is it something I can actually find, I wondered… and kept the concept in mind as I went about my seemingly purposeless life, pursuing an entirely new career and way of working. I found success, and it was short lived, for the work itself had unintended consequences on mind and body. My spiritual aspirations to discover and fulfill purpose foundered.

Fast Forward to NOW: Have you read either of Eckhart Tolle’s books? I skipped The Power of Now and went straight to A New Earth: Awakening to your Life’s Purpose. Tolle’s writing and teaching is accessible, understandable and in harmony with now more practical and mature understandings about the power of reducing rampant thinking in favor of being HERE NOW. Simple, yes…Easy? Not on your life! What Tolle draws upon is his own life experience, but what he conveys is ancient wisdom in modern language. The simple truth, is: we are each here (our “purpose” is) to live NOW. When the student is ready … the teacher does the most effective service, in creating an empty vessel to support a direct experience of the student’s own thinking processes. The end result is “The NEWS, not the editorial”. Huh?

“Never give up!”

You may not have a “life purpose” in the way you have been thinking about it. The best path to take is often the most simple and available one. Church attendance is up and has been climbing since 9/11. Comforting and reliable, predictable, non-confrontational, anonymous, even. Yet, some of the most practical and powerful voices of our times come from the teachings of the ‘old age’, or age old traditions, if you will. Caroline Myss is a medical intuitive and one of the most practical and wise voices around today, was raised in the Catholic traditions and offers a wealth of info, seminars and web events. She has authored a number of books that open doorways we all tend to “forget” as we live helter skelter is a too busy world.

When you select a path to travel with a teacher, choose with care. But, begin with a look to your  spiritual or religious roots. These days, you might find a spiritual guide with a great deal of wisdom in your own tradition with whom you may resonate, though that alone is not a reason to choose it. Likewise, if you choose a path that is unfamiliar, but something attracts you to it, learn about the teacher and the body of work. Then, find out who taught him or her, and where they go for continuous guidance. Humility and a beginner’s mind are marks of a true teacher! Your path will be arduous enough, at times, without adding the problems of an unskillful or inexperienced “master” to the mix!

Are green values at a hospitality center more attractive and more marketable?

I did a little digging to find out. Independent of my own values and choices, I had to know the answer and I also wanted to know if green meetings are practical enough to encourage you to get green:

Green Meetings ARE GOOD for your Business!

Green meeting hospitality makes good business sense. Your center will:

• save money by conserving resources
• create and enhance competitive advantage and reputation
• open up new or niche markets
• present positive opportunities for marketing, improve public relations and demonstrate a commitment to corporate responsibility

Visit Green Meetings website for Ten Tips to get you going!
According to Green Meetings.com:

• There is a market for green meetings. Between May 2003 & December 2004 fourteen environmental or sustainable conferences met in Portland Oregon, representing an estimated income of $10.5 million (Business Journal, 2004).
• Local and regional governments are educating and compelling meeting facilities to reduce their waste stream or face steep disposal costs. San Francisco’s Moscone Center has cut hauling costs by $500,000 per year since beginning a recycling and donations program (Meetings & Conventions, 2004).
• Corporations and associations are feeling pressure from shareholders and members to demonstrate environmental responsiveness and corporate responsibility in their activities, including meetings. According to a 2002 survey by PricewaterhouseCoopers 90% of the US’s 140 largest companies indicate enhancing or protecting reputation was their primary reason for adopting environmentally responsible practices and 89% believe sustainability will grow in importance as a business issue over the next 5 years.
• Organizations are being increasingly pressured to tighten meeting spending. This is causing meeting professionals to consider all options to reduce waste and increase efficiency. Energy efficient lighting in Seattle’s Washington State Convention & Trade Centre has saved almost $200,000 in the last year (Meetings & Conventions, 2004).”

Green Meetings are Good for the Earth

To continue to enjoy the quality of life we treasure we all need to work and live in a more sustainable manner. For the meeting industry this involves making a concerted effort to reduce our use of resources and the amount of waste that results from meeting activities. Find out how you can join Green Meetings in reducing the environmental impact of your meetings.

One quick note: Okay, so your center may operate on a smaller scale, but consider the cumulative effect of changing your practices … or not!

The Green Big Pic

According to the Green Meeting Industry Council a green meeting incorporates environmental considerations throughout all stages of the meeting in order to minimize the negative impact on the environment.

“By the year 2020 the Green Meeting Industry Council envisions a green meeting as an activity that:

• has zero net environmental effect.
• is an accepted and standard industry practice, while ‘brown’ meetings are a thing of the past.
• achieves economic and strategic business goals and minimizes and eliminates environmental impacts and positively contributes to the environment and host communities.
• meets minimum green meeting practices as set out by the GMIC.
• achieves full integration of environmental responsibility into return on investment analysis for the global meetings industry.

The Green Decision, may not be yours to make:

Green Meetings  as an org isn’t just educating meeting venues, they are also targeting Meeting Planners (see our article Let’s Dispel the Myths about Green Meetings) and  thereby planting seeds to grow their green awareness and create a demand for green meetings.

What that means to your business is: NOW is the time to get your green act in gear! And remember, the All About Retreats Green Retreat Award will become an important distinguishing factor for you and the meeting planners or group facilitators who could choose your center for their retreat, workshop, conference or meeting!

Myth: Green meetings are a hassle

Reality: For planners, green meetings involve looking at the decisions you already make in a green light. When inquiring about catering ask for local, organic and vegetarian options. When arranging for printing of collateral materials ask printers to use post-consumer recycled content paper, print on both sides and use vegetable-based inks. Suppliers may need to initially invest some time to set up recycling, energy efficiency or other environmental programs, however, the return on investment in these initiatives ultimately outweighs the initial equipment and human resource cost.

Myth: Green meetings are expensive

Reality: Green meetings are about increasing economic and environmental efficiency by minimizing the use of resources and reducing the amount of waste produced from meeting activities. Trimming waste curbs costs, whether it be through the introduction of energy efficiency programs in hotels and convention centers, by reducing the volume of printed conference materials, providing locally grown food, or designing re-usable signage.

• By providing water in pitchers Meeting Strategies Worldwide avoided an estimated $12,187 to furnish bottled water to attendees (2002).
• Serving condiments in bulk is less expensive than individual serving packages - bulk cream is 62% cheaper and bulk sugar 50% cheaper than single serving sachets (Meeting Strategies Worldwide, 2002).
• Eliminating shuttle bus transportation and selecting hotels and meeting facilities within walking distance eliminated $30,000 - $40,000 for one three-day meeting (Meeting Strategies Worldwide, 2002).
• Day-lighting merchandise on the trade show floor increases sales by about 40% (Meetings South, 2004).

What about the community in which your meeting venue resides? Sure, the venue and the nearby businesses such as shops, galleries, boutiques, attractions and restaurants, take in revenues from meeting and retreat participants. But, what goes on behind the scenes with a bit of planning and coordination, is quite impressive! And, you, as a meeting planner, don’t have to lift a pinky to make it happen!

Green Meetings Benefit Host Communities

Many meetings, events and conferences are moving beyond the significant economic contributions their activities make to destinations to consider additional legacies they might leave with host communities.

Contributions to host communities may include:

• Donation of un-served food to soup kitchens, homeless shelters or other community service organizations.
• Collection and distribution of leftover exhibit materials to charitable organizations.
• Delegate participation in a volunteer activity, such as a tree planting or construction of community housing.
• Providing un-used office supplies and equipment to local schools or charitable organizations.
• Setting aside free exhibit space for local non-profit organizations.

You can visit the Green Meetings website for more details an information. It’s a great educational resource and a good group to know about! Green values aren’t going to go away …. and you can be happy about that! The unintentional consequences of meeting hospitality can be managed. I encourage you to choose green meeting venues when you plan meetings, retreats and other gatherings! Do your Mother a favor: become part of the green meeting movement today!

If you talk with 10 people who have been on a retreat or became part of a spiritual or healing group of some kind, each would give you different reasons why they chose the teacher, the place and the teaching, but all will share that they had a desire or a need to make a life change or to take a respite from their day to day.

Time to retreat ? Is a Guru for you??

Before you take a leap and register for a retreat program or join a “healing” group to challenge your beliefs or discard old habits, get info and be discerning. Particularly, if you are in pain, feeling vulnerable after a loss, or feeling desperately lonely and in need of companionship and solace. There are plenty of folks who earn big money leading groups, retreats and workshops that may not be qualified and can do you more harm than good if they are inexperienced or you are not well-matched with their therapy methods. Take time to interview any teacher or group leader. Get references, if you can. Choose someone who is:

• part of a reputable organization
• teaching a practice that has a solid history
• is willing to provide you with a schedule in advance of retreat events
• is willing to share their thoughts about spiritual or inner work
• is affiliated with a teacher who is their mentor or guide
• states clearly their fees or makes available their rate for services schedule

Even knowing the soundness of my own advice, a few years ago I fell into a trap. I was blindsided by the fact that this teacher was someone I had “known” for over 9 years, who was on a spiritual path and practiced shamanic healing, and was married to my best friend.

Not long after I committed to join the group and work with this person, my gut began to churn. THAT, was my first clue and I ignored it. He was a self-appointed guru, the rules of engagement were mercurial and his rates were steep. He routinely showed up for scheduled individual work an hour or two late believing, “you are always in session”, an invasive tactic that implied he “knew” all, and expected to be paid for his time. I wanted to stay in relationship with my friend and be part of the “sanga”. Because I had a habit of second guessing my instincts, and this guru “knew” that about me, I was vulnerable, wasting time and money before I said “NO MORE!” and withdrew from the relationship.

If something doesn’t FEEL RIGHT, pay attention! In retrospect, because I had experience in and around retreats, teachers, different exploratory and healing modalities and people doing inner work, I thought I could manage the situation, but was quickly over my head. Later, I found the gift: I recognized that it was my decision to say NO and leave the group, the guru and the girlfriend, that benefited me the most! I took a stand and saw that it would have fostered my shortcomings to deny my feelings, thinking the problem was with me and believing that I would get better if I just capitulated to the “teacher”. In the end, I discovered the pearl that was within me!

A true teacher is now easy to identify and I have recently had a wonderful experience here in Vermont. My teacher came highly recommended by a trusted friend and healer. I discovered her credibility as a teacher and her reputation through highly regarded affiliations in the Buddhist community when I “Googled” her. Then, we talked on the phone and our connection was authentic, with no salesmanship on her part. I, the student, was truly ready and the right teacher arrived!